“You are imperfect, permanently and inevitably flawed. And you are beautiful.”
― Amy Bloom 

Body Shame and the Summertime Blues

As part of my two-year commitment to assist an Internship at The Wellness Institute, I had the opportunity to support the interns in exploring their body shame. How is it that we focus on the crease in our belly that came with bearing our children, a nose that is seen as faulting a profile, or for some: “I hate everything about my body.” What allows us to curb our interests like swimming because we fear being seen in a bathing suit? It is body shame. Body shame comes from cultural norms and societal pressures including an advertising community that benefits financially from convincing us that we are not good enough as we are. Sometimes these messages come directly from family members when we are very young.

As the interns rose up to face their shame, I rejoiced at their courage. So much shame was released as they began to connect with all that is precious about their bodies. They took on an awareness that our body is the radiant container we have been given in this lifetime. They began to affirm the strength of their legs, the ability to give birth, and the beauty of breasts that nurse life.

Releasing shame will be a hot topic as the Personal Transformation Intensive enters its second month. The PTI is a fast track to personal growth that I have the pleasure of co-facilitating with Dr. McDermit.

Council Across the Threshold

In July, just before facilitating The Way of Council III at the Ojai Foundation in California, I had the pleasure of sitting in a large council which included the elders in the practice of council in the lineage of the Ojai Foundation. Sitting with Jack Zimmerman, co-author of The Way of Council, I was moved by his sharing of not only how he has been grieving his wife’s death but how he has continued his councils with her as a way of embodying her.

In council, we speak of “the third.” When I sit in dyadic council with my husband, our third is the “Lori-Kevin relationship.” When we sit as a group in council, the third may be viewed as the wise being that emerges from all the members of the circle. Jack and his wife spent many years preparing for how it might be when the first one crossed the threshold to death. Jack continues to hold council with Jaquelyn and continues to receive wisdom from her. By maintaining this healthy relationship, he allows Jaquelyn to continue to create and solidify positive neural pathways in his brain. To my way of viewing reality, we can continue healing each other even after we pass from this life. If you are interested, Jack and Jaquelyn authored several books including Flesh & Spirit The Mystery of Intimate Relationship and Jack and Jaquelyn: An Adventure in Evolutionary Intimacy.

Council 2 Training

In August, I will be joined by council carrier extraordinaire Marlow Hotchkiss for Council II right here at Eaglenest Sanctuary in Shawnigan Lake, a beautiful location to hold this work. Marlow Hotchkiss is a poet, council trainer, avid naturalist, and wilderness guide with over 40 years of circle work with young people and adults in classrooms and in nature. He has taught high school and university level courses in addition to serving for two decades on The Ojai Foundation (TOF) Board of Directors. He was, with Gigi Coyle and Jack Zimmerman, a founding member of TOF’s Leadership Council, and continues today as a senior teacher and member of the Elders Council. Together with other TOF elders, Marlow offers programs in Europe and Africa and has assisted with the launch of the European Council Network.

Marlow and I spent some time together at the Ojai Foundation in July and inspired each other, which bodes well for this training. We want to explore:

• How surrendering to the circle ultimately empowers the individual?
• Where does our shadow work lie?
• What parts do mirror neurons and brain plasticity play in council?
• How do we witness and read the field?
• How do we empower the circle as facilitators?
• What does it mean to think like a circle and how can this thinking change ourselves, our relationships and our institutions?
• We want to know what is alive in each one of us in each moment we have together.

There is so much for us to explore in the beauty of Eaglenest on the Koksilah River. Please contact me if you have experience in circles regardless of whether they go by the name council or something else and are interested in what I’m sure will be a wonderful weekend.

Guided Visualization Circle

Lastly, I have been asked by some members of the most recent Trim Life group to hold a monthly gathering. It would be a time for a guided visualization and then an opportunity to share in council. The day of the week and time are to be determined so if you are interested, please be in touch.

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